Making the Best of My Downtime for a Better Up Time!

All is not lost because when we suffer losses.  We may experience a job loss, a loss of someone we love, a loss of a relationship,  a loss of best friend but all is not lost.  The memories of how much an impact, the experiences gained, the laughter shared, the meeting of the minds, the sheer measure of the touch it had on our lives remains deep within.

Some things we can let go voluntarily and other things go on their own accord.  We cannot allow ourselves to have a pity party.  We have to deal with the loss and move on.  I know first hand how grief can consume a person to the point they stop fighting.  It made me realize the biggest mistake is to call it quits.

When things in life hit you so you feel you're no longer walking on water but swallowing it and gasping for breath, hold your head up, get your baring and stand on your two feet.  Isn't it amazing how we can create an analogy of how simple things like swimming and some of the atrocities that can occur to life itself? 

We learn young not to go to the deep end of the pool until we master the pool at waist level.  Don't get in over your head until you become an experienced swimmer.  We see people with a fear of water and they never go beyond wading their feet in the baby pool.  Or sitting on the edge of the pool at the 3ft-4ft in wading their feet in the water.  Never getting down in the water to get a real feel and experiencing how good and relaxing the whole body being engulfed and feeling the waves of the water against your body, muscles, and skin can feel. 

There are those who will swim with a t-shirt on because they don't people to see their flab, more akin to their vulnerabilities.  And then there are those who will were a bikini or a man with just a fabulous hip hugging pair of swim trunks strutting their stuff like their stuff don't stink.  They show up and show out.  They are fit for the swim.  They dive off the side of the pool and glide across the water like they're a fish.  When that fish comes out of water standing their dripping with water and pick up a towel to wipe off while flexing their muscles.  They were prepared, they tread the water, and they stood up on solid ground after their swim was done.

Isn't amazing how much extra baggage we have to carry when we are not prepared.  Wearing a t-shirt in the water makes the water a little harder to tread.  Not being willing to overcome a fear to swim some would look at as a weakness, an inability to take risks.  Some risks are good.  Some risks lead to greater rewards.

During my downtime I am looking to get better fit to handle the up times.  I realize life requires work.  I'm not looking for a handout.  I'm looking to dive off the highest point to an incline of a full swim across the pool and touch the wall and turnaround and head back to where I started from.  Step up out of the pool and and be thankful that I took the lap and appreciate all the other people in the pool area.  They all provided value in some way.  They help me to appreciate the differences in people.  Some people are happy with a day at the pool, some people are happy at just getting a feel of the pool, some are happy at playing games in the pool, some are happy with watching others enjoy the pool, , some got to conquer it all, and unfortunately and it doesn't happen often, some will let the water consume them and they'll drown. 

It is one of those scenes which lends to seeing how we all blend together for the greater good - to live life according to our own desires, purpose, and aspirations in life.  We are not boilerplate.  We are unique.  We will see more people who will do more to be better swimmers, we will see people do more to make their swimming experiences more fun, we will see people who will do more to make their swim time last longer, we will see people who just want a quick swim and go on to do other things.  

During my down time I am spending more time at home.  I feel my ups are better when I take the time to reflect and redirect my energies towards constantly striving to be better a better person tomorrow than I was today.  Even more attuned to knowing I did my best today.  I am a firm believer than what God has for me is for me.  I keep pressing forward regardless.  Even though the ends are a lot less than the means I don't give up.

I work as hard and as tirelessly as I did before.  Sometimes setbacks are the result of setups, sometimes setbacks are the result of grief and pain, sometimes setbacks are the result of wanting to do more and you have to let some things go to move on.  Whatever the reason the key is to always stay spot on with all that is done.

I'm happy that I have lost about 20 pounds since Christmas.  I'm happy that I have the basics.  I'm thankful and blessed for each day that comes were more of a difference can be made. 

Stay blessed! 

One Perplexing Question on Black and White

Yes that’s me circa 2014.  Yesterday I saw quite a few birthday tributes to MLK on my FACEBOOK page and on other sites as well.  However, one thing I don’t like is that they always show his photos in black and white.  Maybe it is out of respect.  I realize mostly everything was seen in black and white during his lifetime but folks this is 2014.  Dare to be different, go to the websites and snatch a photo with him looking so glowing in full color.  You know they even have some apps now where you can convert black and white photos into color just for fun.  The photo I am posting in this blog entry was taken in color and I converted it to black and white.  It is that time of year for the award ceremonies again and it is the time of the year when most everything dealing with the big screen is still seen in black and white behind the scenes.  You feel me? 

Getting back to MLK, the only color photos I have seen of MLK in recent weeks in color are the distasteful ones some thugs have been photo shopping up and having MLK posing as a gangster rapper.  Too shame!  I wish he could take back the freedoms he fought for in regards to those idiots.  I imagine if he were still alive he may get a good chuckle out of it.  But posthumous it is just totally disrespectful.  I would say their mother should have taught them better than that.  However, this is 2014 and there are a lot of broken families they probably don’t have a mother and are too weak to see a purpose for themselves.  

I consider myself a Civil Rights baby because I was born in 1963.  However, statisticians apparently never saw fit to lump us in a group like Baby Boomers (which overlaps).  I may start my private campaign for that movement because hey at 50 how many more years do I have left to be properly identified?  Well my mother calls me "bit@#" and I don't like that either.  Adversity builds strength and it is with much adversity my strength has been built to not to get into likes and dislikes. 

Speaking of identification, it is tough being a black female in today’s society.  I have seen a lot of progress in my lifetime.  However, I would like to make mention I’ve seen some regress too.   The most significant being nowadays you cannot judge someone by the skin they’re in.  When I look back over my life it has been the ones in a different skin at times who have had the greatest positive impact on my life.  I have had been blessed with several career opportunities, good positions over my gainful employment and self-employment years on this earth, during my academic pursuits, and during times of volunteer service to my former community and I can honestly say it is the negative folk who see everything in black who have given me the most h-e-double hockey sticks in my lifetime.

The hardest challenge I have faced recently is letting go of the emotional attachment as a woman I normally place on friendships, relationships, acquaintances and look at some people differently.  I looked at some folks one day and had an epiphany.  Even though they are in the same skin I am in they are nothing more than what my grandmother used to deem an Uncle Tom.  People who I need not waste another ounce of energy on because they go against the very grain of my existence because I believe everyone deserves to be uplifted.  I don’t believe in kicking people down because they have more shine than me, can read better than me, are smarter than me, look better than me, are skinnier than me, have more education than me, no I don’t look down on folks for vain things.  I was reared with the lesson to treat people as people.  Even though that defiant little inner child in me sometimes wants to act up and treat buttheads as buttheads the adult in me overrides the child.  

For the record, I’m the type of person that I need you to be the same to me in my face as you are behind my back.  Otherwise, there is nothing real there.  If I were to keep lists, which I don’t, they would not appear on my black list, they would not appear on my white list, they would appear on my colorful list because I consider them to be straight up clowns.  Oh no, there goes that inner child.  That was childish wasn’t it?

Oh, by the way, excuse me this is my blog if you don’t like my opinions well then click away and I won’t even digress by telling you were to click away to!  Bad sports move on!  And for those who stay around and listen to my rants and raves thank you.  You know it is 2014 and it is all over the web.  Black women such as me are lonely with no man and no chance of getting a man.  Keep reading into that.  But out of every challenge comes opportunities, there are men ready, willing, and able to handle their fair share of these lonely hearts irrespective of color because it’s all the same in the dark.  Bless their overindulging hearts.

Needless to say, I don’t believe in a cloned society.  We all as individuals bring something wonderfully unique to this game called life.  I don’t walk like a duck, quack like a duck, or act like a duck because I am uniquely and wondrously made.  As the song goes “if you don’t like me so what I don’t care.”   Chances are I don’t just tolerate you.  If life was diminished to likes and dislikes, black and white, hate or love, it would be too extreme for me – there is a happy medium. 

One last thing or more, color is a beautiful thing.  Embrace it!  Someone went to great lengths for us to be able to share the beauty of color via photos, videos, and life itself.  Enjoy it!

 

One perplexing question:  Why do we even need color photos if everything is still being looked at in black and white?

Are you embracing all life has to offer or are you seeing everything in black and white?