Sunday, June 20, 2010

In My Dad's Words

It's Father's Day today and I can't help thinking about my father. I'm so thankful he made my childhood experience fun and enjoyable. My father would always say to me: "Children could never do anything bad enough to deserve a spanking." Needless to say he never spanked me. However, many years later he was always encouraging others to spank my two oldest granddaughters and even at times threatened to spank them himself.

My father was career military. He spent over 27 years in the Navy. I always remember his visits home. The most special times for me was when he would take my brother and I to Ocean View Amusement Park. Almost every night when he was in town we could look forward to spending late evenings at the park. All he did was watch us. He would wear his three-piece suit and spit-shined dress shoes and walk the park with us. He would never get on the rides or play the games he just watched us do everything and watched from the sidelines as if he was our personal bodyguard. As we sailed through the haunted house he didn't take the ride with us he stood on the outside and waited for us (my oldest brother and I).

We loved how much money he spent on us freely. We went to the park with an open purse. He spared no expense. If we wanted cotton candy we could have it, if we wanted popcorn we could have it, if we wanted snow cones we could have it. He never reprimanded us for having all the sweets and treats we wanted. We rode the roller coaster, we rode the merry-go-round, we played the games to try and win stuffed animals. Whatever we wanted to do he let us. No arguments, no admonitions. When I would ask him for 50 cents he would give me twenty dollars.

He really made childhood fun. Most of his friends were military and were just as intelligent as my dad was. When I was a little girl growing up I loved spending time with my dad. When he would go visit his friends he would take me along and a lot of times I would sit in the car until he came back out with his friend and listen to them engaged in conversation waiting for him to get back in the car for our next stop. We would ride together from sun up until sun down. He would always say "whatever you want to do baby". He would take me out to eat and he would always finish eating first and just sit across the table and stare at me while I ate.

I remember times when my grandmother, mother, and I were just at wits end with each other then I would say "I want to go live with my Daddy." My grandmother would tell me "he could have you with my blessings but where is he going to put you, he's on a ship." The only time I ever heard my father holler at someone in a serious tone is when he took me on the ship with him. He liked for everything to be meticulously clean. Everything inside was so shiny nothing like I imagined from the dull gray exterior.

The funniest experience was when he took me to show me how to drive in his Eldorado. The car was just way too big. We got down to the corner of Lafayette Blvd and Tidewater Drive in Norfolk and he put both hands up to his ears and raised his legs up to his chest and screamed "Jesus Christ Lynne Renee". He called me Lynne Renee all the time. I thought I was going to crash the car. I pulled over and told him he could drive us the rest of the way home. He told me I was going to be like my Aunt who never drove because her nerves were too bad. I think that was the first and last time ever when I was in a car behind the wheel with him.

My father was a great example of what defines a man. He took care of his family. He spent time with his children. He always worked. He always gave a whole lot with very little in return. He never talked about his deeds. He did a lot of a lot of people but you would never know it because he never talked about it. The one thing both of my parents had in common they were givers.

At times I wish he would have sat me down and said "Lynne Renee" I may be the exception and not the rule for the men you will meet in your lifetime. As a friend told me once he will explain to his daughter "in life there will be obstacles..."

My daddy was friends with people from all walks of life. He treated everyone the same respect. He used his smarts and intuitiveness to always keep people laughing. He was extremely smart. One of his favorite sayings was: "I talk to myself because sometimes it is the only intelligent conversation I get all day!" and then would crack up laughing."